You snapped at me twice in the past three days
The first time was on CNY day 3, morning, where I ranted to you that the maid didn’t wake up at the time I asked her to and hence I didn’t have fresh boiled water to make Hayden’s milk. You were throwing tomatoes in the pot and I saw that the water was still murky. So I asked did you rinse the rice and throw off the murky water? You said no, and I did a usual nose laughter and that set you off. You turned to me and said “what’s wrong with you?! Hmrph me for what? Morning scold maid also. What is your problem?”
I was so taken aback because a) I genuinely was laughing and not scoffing him and b) I got scolded for telling the maid off?
I was so furious but I just retorted “walaoeh!” And you replied me the same
I’m upset and just broken
You misunderstood my laughter. You’re suggesting that I’m mistreating the helper. And the more heartbreaking part was you scolded me in front of H.
Is this how it’s gonna be? You’re gonna lose your temper at me in front of our son? We said before that we will never do that. Yet you have done it
Your stupid hot temper. Just like your dad. Just like your dad losing temper at your mother in front of you and your siblings
Bravo. This is how it’s gonna be
I will make sure H will not learn this from you
The second time you snapped, was two days later. Honestly I was still not in a chatty mood but I was trying. We were on the way back from the mall and we mentioned to pack lunch from Statellite. Then you passed by the turning and I said “eh I thought we’re gonna tapao?” And you immediately say “you didn’t say also!” Which I said “I already said to tapao the chicken noodle right?”
Wow I really have no mood to deal with you anymore. Back to zero chatty mood.
I keep thinking is it my problem? Where is the problem? What have I done to deserved this kind of attitude? I don’t know, so the best thing for me now is to just keep quiet. Honestly I’m quite phobic of talking to you already. Even now when I laugh I don’t dare to, who knows you will misunderstand again and I get shoot down again?
My heart is VERY WOUNDED ALREADY
I’m just gonna keep quiet and talk less
This way, less chances of miscommunication = less chances of getting shoot
Mentally and emotionally tired
Sad, disappointed, hurt, scared, scarred
And the other night when we were having steamboat dinner, when I causally mentioned “oh the helper stopped eating already” cuz her bowl was not on the table already and she was starting to clear the boxes
In front of your brother you have to say “well you asked her to do things ma”
OMG what is wrong with you?
Are you suggesting I am mistreating the helper? That I stopped her from eating? That I shouldn’t have asked her to do something?
That something was asking her to take a few sets of cutleries so that your brother and family can eat
So I should do it myself or just wait for her to finish eating only ask her to take?
What is a helper for? Helper is there to give us an extra helping hand right? I won’t be an idiot like the last time round where we over took care of the helper (cooking for her, letting her eat before us etc) and doing her job!
And I don’t want to defend myself
What for? If you want to think of me like that, whatever I say will be useless. I can’t do much. I know what I am doing and I know my heart in treating people
I have no one to prove anything to
You want to think of me like that? Go ahead and continue doing so